I don’t usually cite people’s work, however, I was listening to some material from George Carlin, who’s work I utterly admire, because it’s all about telling the truth, but not only telling the truth, but making comedy out of it and making it into parody and basically making people laugh.
I like to ridicule, it’s one of my better qualities, plausibly more so than writing and I do it with a passion, so when I was listening to some of George Carlin’s material, I couldn’t help but chuckle and thought that I would bestow some of it with the public.
We watch tv and we watch the advertisements or the shopping channel which attempt to market their commodities, they tell us that their merchandises have quality, value and style. That if you buy on tv it’s convenient and purports to be moderately affordable.
They tell us that we will be saving money and that they’re a friendly service with named brands, with easy terms and affordable prices, and not only that, you’ll get a money back guarantee. Perhaps even free shipment, or a free home trial – No money, that’s also not a problem, order now, pay later, but you have to order whilst the stocks last.
Then they inform you that all purchases are final, and you’ll have to give it approximately 6 weeks before they ship out your goods, though some items won’t get to you, and some items will require assembling. Buy by mail or purchase by phone, try it in your home, try it in your vehicle.
So, come on in for a free presentation and a free consultation with their affable proficient team. They’re friendly and expert sales agents will encourage you to make a selection that’s exactly right for you and just fitting for your means.
However don’t forget to pick up your free bonus, a traditional and expensive custom created high-quality premium selected pocket torch. Additionally, if you act quickly they will include an added complimentary gift, a vintage and fancy custom produced high-quality selected leather style wallet with detachable key chain and pencil holder.
It’s their way of saying thank you, and if you’re not entirely satisfied, you pay nothing. You can simply return the unused portion for a full refund, no questions asked, it’s their way of saying thank you, keep our free gift. Really, it’s their way of saying, lean over, just a little further and let us stab this huge jackhammer into your anus a little bit farther.