Keir Starmer is vowing to make children brush their teeth and get taller today as he embraces the nanny state.
The leader of Labour has unveiled a proposal to improve the health of children, which includes toothbrushing under supervision for kids in breakfast clubs who are three to five years old.
As part of initiatives to reduce obesity, there would also be a complete prohibition on the promotion of junk food before the watershed. The fact that British youngsters were shorter than their counterparts was seen as ’embarrassing’ by the Allies, who believed it to be a sign of inadequate nutrition.
The proposals open Labour to accusations of meddling in the personal choices of parents on how to bring up their children. But Sir Keir dismissed the criticism, insisting the state must get involved if children’s health is suffering.
Sir Keir said, ‘I have to say when I first read the statistic that for six- to ten-year-olds, the biggest cause of admissions to hospital is decayed teeth, I was really struck.
‘I don’t think you can simply say ‘that’s none of our business’; it is our business because it’s the health of a child. But also, once you’ve got a child admitted into hospital, it’s costing the taxpayer a fortune. So I’m not saying it’s the state and not parents; it’s got to be both.’
And he said he was ‘up for that fight; if people want to say to me, I don’t think we should be doing that’.
Labour’s child health action plan also calls for the introduction of a 9 p.m. watershed for junk food advertisements, the outlawing of youth-targeted vape advertisements, improved access to mental health services, a reduction in the length of hospital wait times for children, increased dental appointments, and the establishment of child health as a cross-government priority.
Speaking before a visit to a leading children’s hospital today, Sir Keir said: ‘Tooth decay, stunted growth, and stalling life expectancy should be consigned to the history books, but instead they’re the reality of Tory Britain.
‘The biggest casualty of the short-term, sticking-plaster politics of the last 14 years are our nation’s children. My Labour government will turn this around.
‘Healthy, happy children is not a nice thing to have; it’s a basic right, with economic urgency. We want the next generation to be chasing their dreams, not a dentist appointment. They should be aspiring to reach their potential, not reach a doctor.
‘Labour will end the scandal of children being held back by poor health and regional inequalities by slashing waits for mental health treatment and hospital appointments, putting prevention first, and fixing NHS dentistry.
‘That’s the future our children and young people deserve, and that’s the future a Labour Government will deliver.’
Shadow health secretary Wes Streeting said Brits were ‘slipping down’ the international rankings for children’s height.
Are British children shorter? That’s rubbish, but many do have a poor diet because of the cost of living crisis, and before you know it, Ricket’s will be prevalent in England again.
The general public are not going to be happy about the government taking over their parental duties, so why not go the whole hog and include potty training in that?
The last time Labour meddled in the education of young people, the result was a toned-down Tony Blairian education that let rural idiots into university. These days, they want kids to become fully committed communists before they become eight years old. We’ll develop into a nation of Starmers.
This is bordering on communism; do as we demand, not as we do!
THE MONTHLY MOSQUITO 