As GCSE Marks Fall by 4.3 Per Cent, Passes Return To Pre-Covid Levels

The proportion of GCSE entries awarded top grades has dropped from last year but is higher than before the pandemic, while students in England were left worse off than those in Wales and Northern Ireland where grade inflation was retained.

Hundreds of thousands of teenagers received their GCSE results today in a year when steps have been made in England to return grading to pre-pandemic levels.

More than a fifth (22.0 per cent) of UK GCSE entries were awarded the top grades, at least a 7 or an A grade, this year, down by 4.3 percentage points on last year when 26.3 per cent of entries achieved the top grades. However, this remains higher than the equivalent figure for 2019, before the pandemic, of 20.8 per cent.

According to figures published by the Joint Council for Qualifications (JCQ) for England, Wales and Northern Ireland, overall, there were 203,000 fewer top grades (7/A) compared to last year, but there were 142,000 more top grades this year than in 2019.

The proportion of entries getting at least a 4 or a C, considered a ‘standard pass’, has fallen from 73.2 per cent in 2022 to 68.2 per cent this year. This is a drop of five percentage points, but higher than 67.3 per cent in 2019. The overall rate for 1/G or above is 98 per cent, down from 98.4 per cent in 2022 and 98.3 per cent in 2019.

In England, exams regulator Ofqual said this year’s results would be lower than last year and they would be similar to those in 2019. But Ofqual has built protection into the grading process which should allow a pupil to get the grade they would have received before the pandemic even if their quality of work is slightly weaker this year.

In England, the percentage of GCSE entries awarded 7/A or above was 21.6 per cent this year, down 4.4 percentage points from last year. In Wales, it was 21.7 per cent, down 3.4 points. And in Northern Ireland, it was 34.5 per cent, down 2.5 points.

In Northern Ireland and Wales, exam regulators say they don’t expect to return to pre-pandemic levels until next year. In Wales, results were midway between those awarded in 2022, the first-year students sat exams following COVID-19 and 2019.

It comes after the pandemic led to an increase in top grades in 2020 and 2021, with results based on teacher assessments instead of exams.

Many years ago when a student was granted an A grade, that was something truly special. Now, it’s basically the norm with the education system being dumbed down.

Back then, when you took your exams, you stood or fell on what you’d been taught and could remember. No marks for class work, and all you took into the exam room were a pen, pencils, ruler, rubber and your brain.

The fact is, you either have it or you don’t, and most university places are for those who want to study medicine, law or economics, but there are a lot of people who never went to university or didn’t do as well at school as they should but have gone on to do extremely well for themselves because common sense can’t be taught.

And those who did get degrees just ended up in a call centre or a completely unrelated occupation, but don’t worry kids, there are plenty of jobs in the Amazon Warehouses, even the jobs the robots feel are beneath them that need to be done.

Are You Spraying Animal Urine On Your Neck?

An undercover investigator has revealed that fake perfume bottles that claim to be made by many of the world’s top luxury labels can often be loaded with animal urine.

Detective and business investigator Tamer Bakiner claims that people across the world are endangering their own health by buying counterfeit goods, as most, if not all, are made with little to no concern for safety or health.

He said that people should quit buying them because they’re dangerous for your health, among other things they mix urine in perfumes to get the yellow colour, and that it’s disgusting.

Secondly, he said it supports a really lousy, inhumane business.

Bakiner wasn’t the only person who has warned that counterfeits could harm a person’s health.

Leo Longauer, the 54-year-old director of brand protection at luxury goods conglomerate LVHM, which operates brands including Dior, Bulgari, Louis Vuitton, and Dom Pérignon, said that fake products can be quite dangerous for your health.

He said that (sun)glasses that are sold have no UV protection even though the label says that they do, and the (perfume) mixtures are loaded with animal urine, that’s why they’re so cheap to buy.

He warned that counterfeits are treated with chemicals that can cause allergies and skin irritation or rashes, and this is not to be taken lightly.

He said that people may actually be buying counterfeit products unknowingly as they’re virtually indistinguishable from genuine products, and he said that many counterfeits can hardly be distinguished from the original.

But the intellectual property enforcer warned that customers who buy counterfeit goods, knowingly or otherwise, are endangering their own health and criminals are being supported and their own economy is being disadvantaged.

He said that the working conditions of local people, for example in Turkey, China, Vietnam or India, are inhumane and don’t meet the standards in Europe and that children are also being used to work. People are being exploited, combined with human trafficking and money laundering.

The worldwide counterfeit industry is vast and profitable, and criminal networks that sell counterfeit goods usually span the world.

Counterfeit goods are frequently manufactured in more impoverished countries with substandard labour and safety laws before they’re marketed in more affluent countries with staggering markups.

Europol estimates that as much as 2.5 per cent of all global trade involves the production and sales of fake or substandard goods.

Many people don’t even care about slave or child labour being used, and if companies didn’t charge such outrageous prices in the first place, then there wouldn’t be a market for counterfeits that are almost indistinguishable.

The only difference between the kosher stuff and the counterfeit is that a top fragrance such as Burberry lasts all day, but of course, you get what you pay for – daylight robbery!

Cows urine is used in the manufacturing of leather, and Ambergris is made with whale vomit, but that’s just fine and dandy, and any secretions that come from the sex glands of an animal to give that musky scent, and the article is probably endorsed and funded by some perfume manufacturer, but to be honest, some pricey designer perfume smells like animal urine anyhow.

Coco Chanel used a secret ingredient to make Chanel №5, one of all-time most popular scents, it’s secret ingredient is cat pee, now a typical additive in numerous fragrances.

Perfume has always been considered an indulgence product, but what makes it so very expensive?

It costs millions to launch a product and create awareness around it, and they come in unique, highly sophisticated bottles, but it’s all about marketing. Someone could create the most intoxicating fragrance in the world, but if no one knows about it, nobody’s going to be buying it.

A Third Killer Heatwave Is Threatening Italy

Italian authorities have triggered yet another red alert for 17 cities with the third punishing heatwave in just two months set to blast the country.

A dozen cities, Bologna, Bolzano, Florence, Frosinone, Latina, Palermo, Perugia, Rieti, Rome, Turin and Verona, were already hit with a red alert from yesterday.

Genoa, Milan, Naples, Trieste and Venice will be bumped into the red on Wednesday, meaning that residents are believed to be at maximum heat risk.

Temperatures in several of Italy’s biggest cities including Rome and Florence are already sitting at 38 degrees Celsius, with the mercury set to tip 40 degrees on Thursday.

A red alert means even the young, healthy and fit are warned to stay out of the sun from 10 am to 6 pm, such is the heat of the baking summer sun.

Storm warnings are also in effect in the southern regions of Calabria, Basilicata and Sicily.

Last month, several cities were forced to compete with widespread power cuts as temperatures reached a whopping 48 degrees Celsius in southern Italy.

Some half a million people were affected in and around the city of Catania, thanks to heat damage to underground cables.

The cuts meant that between 200,000 and 300,000 people were not only without power but also a supply of running water.

Separately, flights were grounded following a fire at the city’s main airport on July 16 that needed terminal-wide repairs.

The high temperatures in Italy come as Greece and one of Spain’s Canary Islands fight fierce wildfires.

Hot, dry and windy conditions are hindering the efforts of hundreds of firefighters fighting the fires, two of which have been burning for several days.

Europen Union officials have blamed climate change for the increasing frequency and intensity of wildfires in Europe, noting that 2022 was the second worst year for wildfire damage on record after 2017.

Authorities said the body of a man was recovered from a sheep pen in the area under evacuation, with local media saying the man apparently died of smoke inhalation while trying to save his livestock.

In the northeast of the country near the border with Turkey, powerful winds revived flames on several fronts in a major wildfire burning for a third day across forests and farmland near the town of Alexandroupolis.

Deputy Fire Chief Ionnis Arttopios said that several homes were destroyed over the weekend. Thirteen villages were evacuated, while more than 200 firefighters, assisted by 17 water-dropping aircraft, volunteers and the armed forces were battling the fire.

However, it’s always extremely hot in these countries around this time of the year, so this is nothing new.

I looked at my weather app this morning and in Turin, Italy this morning it was 30.5 Celsius going up to 35 Celsius by 4 pm, with sunny and light winds. It’s called summer and there’s nothing new about this.

So, do we really trust anything that the media tell us?

People must have friends from Italy that will probably tell you that it’s not as hot as the media tell us, but they will still spout their red and yellow warnings. Then we’re warned about heat waves – it’s a bit like the boy that cried wolf, and then we fall for the climate change propaganda hook, line and sinker.

It appears that this Climate Change is a con inflicted on us all by the elites and their lame selfish brains, and climate change is the latest pandemic that they can come up with, and if I went to Italy at this time of the year and it wasn’t hot I would feel that I’d been ripped off.

Parents Should Ask Babies For Permission Before Changing Nappies

A sexuality expert has said that parents should ask their babies for consent before changing their nappies in order to set up a culture of permission from birth.

Deanne Carson, who described herself on Twitter as a sexuality educator, speaker and author, made the assertion while talking on ABC. She said she works with children from three years old on issues surrounding consent, but added that parents are advised to introduce ideas much earlier.

Deanne acknowledged that babies are unable to give an answer, but said it’s important to use eye contact to teach them their response matters, and on a segment aired on consent law, she said that they work with children from three years old and that they work with parents from birth.

The reporter appeared bewildered and asked ‘From birth?’. The reply was yes and that it was just about how to set up a culture of consent in their homes and that a parent would say that they were going to change their nappy now and was it okay.

Deanne replied that of course, a baby wasn’t going to reply, but that if you left it a while, and waited for their body language and waited for the baby to make eye contact, then the parent was letting the child know that their response matters.

Numerous viewers seemed baffled by her suggestion with Twitter users saying that surely they weren’t hearing this right and that they were shocked, and one wrote: “If this doesn’t qualify for Lefty Lunacy…”

Deanne claims that when they make eye contact then you were letting your child know that it’s their response that matters. How on earth would a baby of that age understand that its response matters?

And what if the baby can’t give eye contact, for instance, if they’re Autistic or have some other condition, is one supposed to just leave their baby in a soiled nappy?

Honestly, the world has gone completely bonkers.

Clearly, this person has never had to change a toddler who’s running away, screaming no because they don’t want their playtime interrupted for such an insignificant thing as a nappy change.

Consent doesn’t come into it when it’s for the health and well-being of that child, and presenting a choice by asking a question that has a predetermined outcome could do more damage to that child’s understanding of consent when growing up.

Things could also lead to a more serious problem if a child responds wrong, or it could be that the child will learn to respond how they believe you want them to answer, which could lead to murky waters around sexual consent as teenagers or adults.

The baby has pooped for goodness sake, it stinks, it’s uncomfortable and the baby is screaming its head off. Well, the parent has a choice, either remove the nappy and put on a clean one or just leave the poor child there screaming its head off, while in the meantime the baby’s skin is becoming sore. It’s screaming because it’s uncomfortable. It actually doesn’t care whether it gives you permission or not – let’s hope this woman doesn’t go into schools, I’d dread to think what she’d be telling those poor children, and this woman should really be leaving those mushrooms alone, either that or she needs serious medical help.

What Is The State’s Attitude Toward Us? Are We Its Enemies?

The Government, in their mindset, seem to believe that they’re fighting the enemy, the enemy being the people who live in that nation, but the real enemy is our exploitive Government which sucks all the wealth out of the economy.

Politics on both sides of the Atlantic has been characterised by populist catchphrases, such as ‘Take back control’, and ‘Make your country great’, but this is a wilful and systematic disregard for telling the people the truth because we are considered the ‘Enemy of the State’.

Both the Tories here in the United Kingdom and the Republicans in the US have created a division by harnessing public fear, and now we have shady, unelected and unaccountable bodies who are allegedly responsible for our economic and societal adversities, and who pledge to combat on our behalf.

Governments are believed to be squeaky clean, but if you believe that, then you will believe anything. No one is infallible and behind the scenes, there are good people and then there are corrupt people.

There are people that will conspire and cover-up, and if that cover-up gets into the wrong hands they will do whatever they need to do and by whatever means is available, and it could happen to any unsuspecting person, walking about, minding their own business.

Nobody is safe, and Governments have control over everything that we do, and in our lives. Intercept our phone calls, freeze our bank accounts, they could even frame you for murder. They have the technology!

Edward Snowden revealed that one, but most people would have forgotten who Edward Snowden even was. He was the guy that told us that Government can hack into your smartphone and see everything.

He said that the Government could take control of your smartphone to look at your browser history, see emails and texts and listen to your conversations, and this man would know all about it because he was the former US security man that said the UK Government had invested heavily in technology to hack mobiles.

He revealed that Government Communications Headquarters (GCHQ) in Cheltenham uses a secret programme codenamed ‘Smurfs’ to monitor its citizens.

He said that ‘Dreamy Smurf’ is a power management tool which means turning your phone on and off without you knowing, and that ‘Nosey Smurf’ is the ‘hot mic’ tool, so for example, if it’s in your pocket they can turn the microphone on and listen to everything that’s going on around you.

And even if your phone is switched off, they have got other means for turning it on.

Snowden, who worked in America’s National Security Agency (NSA), disclosed there was also a tool to track phones through geolocation, allowing spies to find where you are to pinpoint accuracy.

So, in fact, they want to own your phone instead of you, and once your phone is under GCHQ control, operatives can see who you call, what you’ve texted, the things you’ve browsed, the inventory of your contacts, the places you’ve been, and the wireless networks that your phone is associated with, and they can do much more. They can photograph you.

Snowden also said there was another software, called ‘Paranoid Smurf’, which seeks to prevent technicians from finding out that Government workers have control over the smartphone if you become concerned.

Snowden said, as well as those suspected of planning terror attacks, agencies target people it believes are carrying out serious crimes such as paedophilia, but he said they gather mass data to find out who those targets may be.

The whistleblower, who now lives in Moscow because he’s under fear of detention by the US for leaking top secrets, said GCHQ collects bulk data under another system. This permits them to take control of the server and this tactic is used aggressively.

He said that Computer Network Exploitation (CNE) was essentially digital espionage.

What they try to do is take control of things they don’t own. What the Intelligence Agencies like to do is hack those network service providers and discreetly take ownership of the devices that are affecting traffic without the service providers ever knowing about it.

Snowden said he knows the tactics used by the UK spy agencies as he had privileged access to all files in his role, including British government documents, and that, in effect, GCHQ acted as a subsidiary of America’s NSA.

He said that when he was sitting at his desk working with tools of mass surveillance every day, he saw that all of their communications were being intercepted all of the time in the absence of any suspicion of wrongdoing, and this was something that was occurring without our knowledge, without our consent.

He said GCHQ is for almost intents and purposes a subsidiary of the NSA, they provide technology, they provide tasking and direction as to what they should go after, and in exchange, GCHQ provides access to communications that are collected in the United Kingdom.

Snowden said he was acting in the public’s interest releasing the information and added, that they have particular targets, but to find out who those targets are they’ve got to collect mass data.

US government officials brought charges against Snowden under the Espionage Act, but he said that the claims of stealing information were unfair and he fears that if he were to return to the US he would be given a life sentence.

He said that the Espionage Act finds anyone guilty who provides any information to the public regardless of whether it’s right or wrong and that you’re not even permitted to explain to a Jury what your reasons were for revealing that information, and that it was just a question of, did you disclose information. If yes, then you go to jail for the rest of your life.

But he did admit he has been offered a plea bargain with the government and would be prepared to go to prison, but he said the only assurance that he got from the US was that he wouldn’t be tortured.

In a statement about the allegations of spying on smartphones, a GCHQ spokesman said that it was a longstanding policy and that they don’t comment on intelligence matters.

The spokesman said that all of GCHQ’s work was carried out in accordance with a strict legal and policy framework, which ensured that their actions were authorised, necessary and proportionate and that there was strict oversight, including from the Secretary of State, the Interception and Intelligence Services Commissioners and the Parliamentary Intelligence and Security Committee.

They also said that their operational processes rigorously supported their position and that the UK’s interception regime was completely compatible with the European Convention on Human Rights.

Heartbreaking Study Finds Children In Destitution Miss Out On Education

A heartbreaking study has discovered that the number of children living in poverty has soared in the past year, with education now a luxury that numerous families can no longer afford.

A new State of Child Poverty report, produced by charity Buttle UK, found 122,000 children are living in poverty, accounting for 60 per cent of the young people frontline workers support. This is up from 45 per cent in just 12 months, with ministers facing calls to ditch the two-child Universal Credit limit and introduce an Essential Guarantee.

Researchers talked to more than 1,200 workers who support children in poverty, with one saying that the families they support were now having to make choices about whether they can eat or stay warm, with families not being able to enjoy both and that this had a significant impact within the families they support, and that a parent had to choose whether to keep the child off school so that they could get milk and bread with the money that would have been spent on bus fares.

Six in 10 of supported children are slipping behind at school, with the charity warning that education is becoming a luxury that some families can no longer prioritise because it’s no longer a given that families can sustain basic needs, such as a warm roof over their heads or regular food to eat.

Destitution refers to those enduring the lowest standards of living in the United Kingdom, and in order to be classed as destitute, a family must meet two of five criteria in the previous month. Sleep rough for at least one night, have had fewer than two meals for more than two days. Have not been able to heat and light a home for more than five days, not had the right clothing for the weather conditions or been unable to afford essential toiletries like soap or toothpaste.

Labour MP Catherine McKinnell, who chairs the Common Petitions Committee, said that as a society, we’re failing our children and harming their futures, and that was always going to be the poorest families that were most vulnerable to soaring food, rent and fuel prices since so much more of their household income is spent on the basics.

She said that it’s still shocking to see the scale of the suffering caused by the cost of living crisis laid out in Buttle UK’s annual report. The report found that crippling fuel costs are driving cycles of deprivation with families unable to afford essentials, while 70 per cent of young people in poverty experience mental health problems.

Joseph Howes, chief executive of Buttle UK, said their report demonstrated the catastrophic impact of the pandemic and the cost of living crisis, which has meant that more and more children are having to go without food and that the situations those challenges are creating are preventing them from having any chance to reach their potential at school, and that the increase in children and young people living in destitution is stark and worrying.

Now, millions of children under the age of four are growing up in poverty, and education is a luxury for many, as well as the lack of support services in local communities which were having a negative effect on families.

Children need a healthy balanced diet and a wide range of nutrients to help them stay healthy. Rickets was an ailment that was a thing of the past, but soon, if things carry on the way they are, these childhood diseases that were a thing of the past will soon be back.

And very soon Christmas will be a thing of the past because it will be something that people only dream about because they just won’t be able to afford it.

Of course, the wealthy will be able to afford everything that they want. It’s always been that way, but now it’s even more alarming.

Eventually, the rich will be allowed what they like, but the impoverished and disadvantaged they won’t even be allowed to own property or any possessions.

Everything that our Government tell us is a wealthy delusion. Well, to the unassuming it is.

Wealth has always been tied to Governments and of course, the Bank of England. It was how they controlled us and how they still control us.

Women’s World Cup Final Row Deepens Over Prince William’s Absence

The row over Prince William’s absence from this weekend’s Women’s World Cup final deepened as a former sports minister said the royal should be there.

Kensington Palace confirmed earlier this week that the Prince of Wales who’s president of the Football Association and thus responsible for facilitating the game nationally and internationally, would not be making the trip Down Under.

He will instead be roaring on the Lionesses, who are representing England in their first World Cup final since 1966, from home, as will Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, who will also not be in attendance for Sunday’s clash with Spain.

Gerry Sutcliffe, who acted as sports minister under Gordon Brown between 2007 and 2010, told a newspaper outlet that he thought that the Prince of Wales should be there.

He said that he knew it was a long way and he was sure he had had family commitments but this was a unique moment and it was the World Cup final.

Kate Osborne, the Labour MP, told Times Radio that we all know that if this was the men’s final, Rishi Sunak, and the FA president, Prince William, would have been in attendance no matter how long the flight to Australia was.

Neither Prince William nor Rishi Sunak attended any of the England men’s World Cup games in Qatar last winter.

However, the row was intensified when the Royal Spanish Football Federation confirmed that Queen Letizia and her 16-year-old daughter, Infanta Sofia, would be in Sydney, to show, once again, that the royal household’s support for national football.

The pair will sit in the presidential box at the Accor Stadium, but won’t be joined by King Felipe, who’s occupied with other official responsibilities.

Letizia visited the Spanish team in Madrid before they travelled to the game, watching them train and being presented with a personalised jersey.

The federation said she finished the visit with a motivational speech that resonated greatly with the players and coaching entourage.

FA chief executive Mark Bullingham said that bosses had always known Prince William wouldn’t be attending, but that he’d been a brilliant supporter of the team throughout.

The heir to the throne led tributes to the Lionesses following their historic 3-1 semi-final win over Australia on Wednesday, describing it as a phenomenal performance.

He added: ‘Commiserations to @TheMatildas, you’ve played brilliantly and been fantastic co-hosts of this World Cup.’

But really, should Prince William have travelled all the way to Australia to watch the match, which would have generated uproar and an unnecessary carbon footprint – poor man can’t do right for doing wrong.

However, the Royal Family and MPs alike are consummate hypocrites who use private aircraft like they’re taxis, and not always for official business, but this trip is part of Prince William’s role and part of his role as a football patron.

Getting to the final of the world cup is a monumental event and supporting that is surely what he gets remunerated for, and it’s his job to support the achievements of the nation, after all, he travels all over the world frequently when it suits him to shake hands and wave, why not now?

I’m not really into the carbon footprint/global warming malarky, but those that do spout off about it should practice what they preach.

And it’s only a row because the media want to make it so. In the great scheme of things does it actually matter?

The Queen was away from her children for months at a time to go overseas and do her duty. Did she worry about her children, no of course not – there were nursemaids to muster around and help out. The King was also not a hands-on parent, due to the demands of the job.

I understand that Prince William is more of a hands-on parent and that we live in a more modern society now, but he will one day be the representative of this country, but if it turns out that he’s not going to be, what is he being paid for and do we actually need a Royal Family? 

A Salute To The King Of Chat Shows

Stars including Sir David Attenborough and Sir Elton John paid an emotional tribute to TV titan and king of the chat show Sir Michael Parkinson after his death at the age of 88.

Sir Michael Parkinson, who was fondly known as ‘Parky’ by his friends and fans, passed away surrounded by his wife Lady Mary and their children at his Berkshire residence last night.

Paying tribute, Sir David Attenborough, 97, said being interviewed by him was like meeting a friend, and admitted his Yorkshire timbre was very refreshing at a time when southern, upper-class accents were common on the BBC.

He said he was extremely generous. He wanted you to shine and would always laugh at your jokes and give you an opportunity to make them sound funnier than in fact, they were. He said it was always friendly, it was always thorough, it was always intelligent, and it was always a pleasure to do it and he said he thought that came over no matter who his interviewee was.

Sir Elton John said he loved spending time with Parky, and that Michael Parkinson was a TV legend who was one of the greats. That he loved his company and his incredible knowledge of cricket and Barnsley Football Club, and he was a real icon who brought out the very best in his guests.

BBC broadcaster Nick Robinson said on Twitter that he was the greatest interviewer of our age who owned Saturday Night TV year after year, and that Michael Parkinson was the king of the chat show.

The down-to-earth Yorkshireman was the son of a coal miner and became one of the most well-known names in Britain after his seminal interviews with Muhammad Ali, John Lennon, Billy Connolly, Orson Welles and most of the world’s biggest celebrities in an outstanding TV career spanning five decades.

There were also wildly comical, and awkward interviews, including being attacked while talking to Rod Hull and Emu as well as a cranky Meg Ryan in 20 years of more than 2,000 BBC interviews beamed into up to 17 million homes on a Saturday night.

He said his greatest regret was never being able to interview Frank Sinatra, and recently revealed that Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, was his most formidable interviewee.

Parky presented his programme Parkinson from 1971 to 1982 and again from 1998 to 2004 on the BBC. He then changed to ITV where his talk show ran from 2004 to 2007. He was last seen in public in April. The cricket-mad journalist was frail as he celebrated his friend Dickie Bird’s 90th birthday party at Headingley, Leeds. His last TV appearance was last November.

Parky was a legend and I hope he’s up there, still sparring with the late great Mohammed Ali. There will never be another chat show host like him and it was an honour and privilege to see all his interviews.

What a fantastic life Parky had and he brought joy to so many people, myself included.

He brought celebrities into our homes – proper celebs, no z listers, and usually they weren’t there just to plug something, but it was a different generation and it will be much missed.

I Poked Holes In My Parents’ Condoms

A woman’s shock revelation that she poked holes in her parents’ birth control as a child has sent millions reeling.

Keely, from the US, recently declared that she’s the reason her younger sister was conceived.

The mum of four had been keeping the secret for 25 years, but couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Keely shared that she was home alone with a friend one day when they snuck into her mum’s bedroom and went through the bedside table.

The duo found a few condoms, and after Keely’s friend explained what they were, the children decided to use a nearby sewing needle to pierce the packets.

Keely revealed the secret on her sister’s 25th birthday in a now-viral video.

She wrote that she’d kept the secret for 25 years and she thought it was time to share.

She began the video by apologising to her parents for the mistake.

‘Mum, I’m so sorry,’ she said. ‘But I’m not sorry because Sam’s here.

‘My best friend and I went into my mum and dad’s bedroom when we were younger, and there were some shiny packets on the nightstand.

‘I don’t know how she knew, but [my friend] told me [they were condoms] and explained what they were used for.’

Keely then shared that there was a sewing needle placed right next to the condoms on the nightstand.

She added that she and her friend poked lots of holes in the packets.

The American woman soon forgot about her illicit activity and was overjoyed when her parents announced that they were pregnant with her younger sister six months later.

Keely said that her mum had told her she was pregnant and she was so happy, but she said that her mum kept saying she didn’t know how it happened because they were so careful.

Millions were in hysterics over Keely’s confession.

One suggested that this needed to be in her speech when her sister gets married.

Another wrote that it was an expensive little joke.

A woman said that she hoped that she held this over her sister’s head every time they needed a favour.

A man wrote that she owed her mum child support for that.

Whether this is true or not, it’s still extremely amusing, although people will say anything to get their name in the funny papers. This particular story appears to have holes in it just like the apparent prophylactic.

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